Friday, February 6, 2015

rampant spatulation


Spatulence

When will we ever, ever learn?
Her job is just one thing: to turn
the pancakes so they will not burn.

But when we call her to the task
(golden brown is all we ask)
she does not hop to speedy fast.

We shake the pan; she won’t come near.
She sticks her fingers in her ears,
shows us that she will not hear,

 singing “Spatu-la-la-la-la-la,
             spatu-la-la-la-la-la!”


I will say, I don't know about this one...what do YOU think?  Get lots of helpful opinions at the PF Round-up, hosted today by Liz at Elizabeth Steinglass
 

HM 2015
all rights reserved

10 comments:

  1. I love it! Soon you're going to have the whole utensil drawer!

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  2. This works for me. Actually I think it might be about me. The only line that doesn't quite work for me is "she does not hop to speedy fast." I mean, yes, that describes me, but I think the line could be smoother. It's clear her brain's escaped, and fast!? Maybe you need to replace fast. But overall, yes, it's working.

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  3. Love the title! Here's my response:

    "Poor Spatula"

    She's smooth, she's strong, she works a lot.
    It's not her fault that Griddle's...hot.

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  4. Heidi,
    I read your poem and thought it would work well as a group project with kids helping on the "la-la's" much like the repetition of Matt's shovel in his poem posted today. Then I saw his comment.
    There must be something going on over in The Poets Garage. Is there something fun in the water?

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  5. Love! (Agree with Liz about tripping over the speedy fast line a bit, though.)
    The ending is perfect!!

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  6. Take Matt's line, if he's offering. I love the rhythm of this poem. Like Liz, the line that didn't word was "she does not hop to speedy fast." I had to read it twice to get the rhythm of it with a pause after to. Should hop-to be hyphenated? Thanks for sharing your utensil project with us. Fun!

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  7. I like this one for me, but I'm not sure it's as accessible for kids. Spatulence -- HA!

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  8. Really fun, but I have to tell you when I read the title I was expecting that spatula to be spitting farts on the griddle. Must be a seventh grade mind checking in somewhere.

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  9. The title is a poem all by itself! Not sure I made the connection between the title and the rest of the poem, but I had no problem enjoying the merits of both.

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