Thursday, November 2, 2023

hallowed be a rest

Greetings, all, and happy November!  The hiatus is over, at least for now. I'm back in time meet the challenge set by our very flexible friend Linda Mitchell, who charged us thus:

Write a prose piece–find a poem in it.
Or, write a poem, expand it into a prose piece.
Or, find a prose piece, transform it into a poem
Or, find a poem and transpose it into a prose piece.
Any interpretation of this prompt is perfect.
Going rogue is acceptable too.


I seem to have colored perfectly outside the lines: I made a poetry-kind-of-object, and then transformed it into a prose piece.

 



I decided also to make a version for younger readers:



I wonder if you prefer one version over the other, and why.  

Thanks to Buffy Silverman at her blog for hosting us today along with the first flakes of snow where she is--wow!  Here's where you can see the rest of our critique group's responses to the challenge:

Catherine @ Reading to the Core

Mary Lee Hahn @ A(nother) Year of Reading
Molly Hogan @ Nix the Comfort Zone
Linda Mitchell @ A Word Edgewise
Margaret Simon @ Reflections on the Teche
 


And thank you for being willing to welcome folks back when they have been away a while.  If you feel like being EXTRA supportive, go like my WHISPERshout Page on Facebook, and maybe join me on Bluesky, now that I have officially defected from Twittx.  May poetry prevail!


17 comments:

  1. Very nice! As for which I prefer-- a mix! The first two sentences of the first version resonate strongly, and I find the clean lines and the use of the red "o" in the crossword part in the second really appealing. Thank you for sharing. :)

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  2. Who to bring hope? YOU! Along with a wonderful dose of outside-the-lines creativity. Thank you, Heidi!

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  3. Heidi, wailed vowels and icy consonants indeed. What a creative approach to a tragic situation.

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  4. I probably lean a bit toward the child version... What stands out is poetry from acrostic (as opposed to the traditional acrostic poem). And what jumps out is "peace by piece" - Sigh!

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  5. And now I want to peer into the wondrous mind of Heidi, who thinks so outside the box (well maybe in boxes.) I love both versions--the adult one was a bit more difficult for me to see the messages at first, but it got me peering longer. I love the red hole that must be filled up, that needs to be made whole. Thanks for bringing hope in the midst of dis-ease.

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  6. Aw, cool! I like the second version best. It puts me in mind of the Wordplay Poem as created by Nikki Grimes, where (at least in my own versions) the poet talks about the physicality of the words, too. Not just the meaning. And in the best ones, they find a way to talk about both at the same time. This is lovely.

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  7. Putting the poem plea in a puzzle shows the terrible challenge of rendering peace into a whole, meaning all of us. One volunteer told me yesterday she was having a hard time. I won't say which side she is so worried about but she burst into tears, feeling very helpless. It reminds me of your creation, Heidi, a call that has no answer, at least right now. It's so poignantly done!

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  8. You have two amazing mind puzzles here.I like the 2nd puzzle best because it is more visible to me. How in this mixed up world can humanity find the right solution to do away with the holes and find peace not just random pieces here and there?

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  9. Well, look at the way you polished the first to make it shine even brighter! And the second...wow, you distilled your thinking so perfectly. I think they belong together, not for adult/child, but for image and mirror set side by side so readers can go back and forth getting more and more out of each the longer they look. Brilliant, my friend. Simply brilliant.

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  10. Agree...love the revision you put into piece 1. And, as much as I love the hug for Gaza...the whimsy of the second piece gets the most of my admiration. I need kids to want to play with words more these days! You are a hero on that front.

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  11. Welcome back, Heidi! I have missed your enthusiasm and creativity. I prefer the clarity and ease of the second version, but do like the greater engagement and challenge of the first. So many broken lives and so much healing needed. Holes make me think of guns.

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  12. Wow! Heidi, your brain is truly an amazing thing! I love both pieces and agree that the visual clarity of the second is especially appealing. That single red hole is horribly powerful. I do like Mary Lee's idea that these are companion poems. What a way to come back from a hiatus!!!

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  13. This is so creative, Heidi! I love the word play with piece and peace, whole and hole that imparts such an important message. I probably lean toward the second version - so perfect for kids.

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  14. Heidi, welcome back. Thank you for your beautiful poetry-kind-of-object and your exquisite take on Linda's prompt. Wow. I like both of the versions, but when I read the first, I was distracted trying to find some of the words in the grid and I got distracted. I read it a few times. Powerful thoughts that don't all get into the second one, but I do think I prefer the second one for its powerful and simple message.

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  15. Wow, these are amazing! I prefer the second version, but both are very creative and wonderful!

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  16. Heidi, you never cease to astonish me! Both of your "perfectly outside the lines" responses are perfectly constructed. I prefer the second version, but agree with Mary Lee that they have more power read as a pair, two pieces of a whole. I might share with my 6th graders if that is okay with you.

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  17. A difficult—tender topic to condense, though your poem achieves this handsomely in both versions. I do like the hint of words popping up in the first version. Thanks for your care and thought, and I’ll stop by your other sites.

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Thanks for joining in the wild rumpus!