Saturday, April 13, 2013

30d30w: word 13


birthday

 secret whistles,
fiery code…
              nothing.
happy wrapping
hides the empty
         cage.

something

This is so interesting!  I was pretty sure that the inhabitant of the cage had passed on to the spirit plane, but your suggestions--and what a lot of good ones--tell me otherwise.  You don't want death; you want escape, intrigue, search and surprise!  (Do we shy away from death when writing for young people, or lately in this world must we dwell on it too much?)

Okay, we'll go there, but despite all the fuller words you suggested, I'm going with Dori's something. It tenses against the big "nothing" of the first stanza and waits open and ready for clues, allowing a sense of anticipation and hope to build.

The icon above is to remind us all that Irene's Progressive Poem stops here tomorrow--a double dose of collaboration! 

8 comments:

Thanks for joining in the wild rumpus!